Sunday, February 21, 2010

complaining time-out

I'm going to be debbie-downer/connie complains-a-lot for a moment:
don't bitch about not being able to lose any weight despite doing about an hour of cardio every day whenever you drench everything in cups of sugary condiments, eat pints of ice cream, bags of chips, and half of a pizza in one sitting.
I love being persecuted because I like to eat healthily because I know I'm treating my body right and because it makes me feel so much better to eat huge amounts of veggies instead of tons of processed foods or dairy that just leave me ready to pass out or feeling lethargic, nauseous, and bloaty. It feels so good to have the support of your family in doing something that you know is better for yourself and that you are passionate about. At least I have a few people.

Saturday, February 13, 2010


to start a training program for a half marathon even though i'm not actually running a half marathon, or to accept the fact that nightly leg cramps and crazy leg pain are evidence that i'm just not a runner?
The latter would give me an excuse to spend $30 a month on yoga classes. The former would mean building crazy endurance but also leg cramps (ow, ow, ow). Decisions, decisions.

Friday, January 1, 2010

New Years?

I wish I could think of a "ten for 2010" type deal, but I don't know if I can think of ten things.

1. Go vegan - finally! What is holding me back?
2. Stop procrastinating! Give my best effort but don't always go so crazily overboard.
3. Find and stick with a good, de-stressing hobby. I think I've found one in running and going to the gym, but who knows.
4. One A in AP studio. Just once, I'd love to get an A. Whether it's this semester or the first semester of my senior year, provided I put myself through that hell again.
5. Keep track of my money more!
6. Start learning more about possible career paths. I'll have to apply to colleges later in the year, so I need to have at least an idea of what I might want to do.
7. Learn something new - monthly. And by this I mean a new painting technique, or something dorky like that.
8. Read more!
9. Become the happiest I can be with my life. I don't entirely know where to start with this - I'm thinking I should start with becoming completely happy with my body.
10. Make better friends. I've been lacking in the friend department, it's mostly my own fault - but I wouldn't mind having a best friend, one that isn't a bad influence on me. And because I could actually make this a number 11 but that would defeat the purpose, I'd like to get closer to my family, too.

Maybe that wasn't so hard.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Marathon training, I should do that.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

i woke up this morning with a mash up of kelly clarkson's my life would suck without you and all time low stuck in my head.
i had the best sleep ever probably induced by a mass amount of peanut butter.
i'm trying not to lose the christmas cheer by overthinking how much money i spent yesterday!
and i also woke up, again, with the extreme urge to run, but i know if i tried to now i wouldn't get very far because i havent been running in about a month
but its christmas eve for me and i'm excited

Monday, December 21, 2009

This break is so incredibly nice. I just don't want to go back to school, I kind of completely hate it there.
I'm considering applying to Bard's, but it's a fifty dollar application fee and I'm not sure how serious my parents will take me if I mention it to them. I'm going to try hard to keep my sanity for the remaining year and a half at Manual, but it's going to be hard. The only thing really keeping me from maybe switching schools or switching out of Visual Arts is the amount of work that I have already put into school, and the fact that I get a senior gallery show next year. But at this rate, I'm not going to have any art to put in a senior show.
But enough complaining, it's christmas time! I'm stoked, especially after seeing It's a Wonderful Life last night. I'm maybe too much of a sentimentalist, if that's a word, but what an inspirational story. It's pretty hard to hate life after that.
Man, I miss being a little kid. Yeah, that is completely irrelevant.
And I'll spare my complaining about how irritated I am with most of the people I know that are my age. They'll find out that they aren't invincible eventually. I sure did.

Friday, December 18, 2009


I made it through the week! This was probably the most difficult week I have experienced all school year. I did pretty much an entire history project by myself, five art assignments, and had three finals to study for; it was alot of work. I went to be around 1ish or later every night this week, so I was super tired when i came home today. I took a nap. I was excited to get a good workout in finally but instead I took a nap - I can get a really good workout in tomorrow morning. I really want to go running, but there are several things that prevent me from doing that. One of them would be the snow that's supposed to come tomorrow. Yay!
Needless to say, I'm kind of dissapointed in myself because I know I could have studied harder, stayed up later and finished projects or assignments to a better quality, and just put more effort into all of the assignments I had this week. I got a 76 on my math final - I still have an A in the class, miraculously - but I could have actually studied. I could have also studied for my english final more last night instead of making upwards of 60 cookies.
I'm not too down about my failures though, because it's a new semester soon so I can turn things around. I have several things I'd like to do with the start of the new year - resolutions, I guess. It just helps me to set start dates for goals.
1) If I get a YMCA membership, I'd like to go at least three times a week, do some yoga or spinning classes, and get serious about running. My huge goal is to run a marathon...
2) Go vegan. Finally. Completely. And with some sort of family support.
3) Put more effort into my artwork; get more inspired.
4) Procrastinate a hell of a lot less
5) Spend less time online or watching tv! Which, if I stuck to the goals above, I'd be doing a lot less of this anyway.
6) Complain less. Somehow throughout Junior year, I've become a lot meaner and complain more.. I used to be so nice, I'd put anyone before myself, maybe too much sometimes. I don't know what happened there.
These are all things that I know would make me happier and in turn healthier.

Right now, I just downed two cups of delicious coffee, and I'm about to get all cuddly on this couch watching Scrooged. It feels nice not having anything to do. I'm excited for tomorrow!